I have had an awful restaurant experience. I mean really awful. Downright sinister.
I am on a company trip. Our entire crew from three states met to have dinner. First-off my state's (Arkansas) group had to sit at an entirely separate table, and we were not included in all of the fun conversation. But that does not really detract from the eating experience, it's just something that cheesed me off.
We voted on places to go and we ended up going to Toby Keith's "I love this Bar and Grill".
The upside down longhorn head above the entry door on the inside really struck home just how much of an Oklahoma boy Mr Keith must be. Advertising your hatred for a team when a lot of people come up to OK from Texas and might eat in your restaurant is incredibly ballsy.
We waited for our drinks for ten minutes or so. The sweet tea was ok, but not great. Then they forgot everyone's salads, which was ok because the people who ordered them got free dessert. The appetizer, chips with queso, took another 10 minutes finding it's way to our table and they tried to give it to an entirely different table. The queso was quite obviously cheap velveeta with a TON of hot peppers, rotel, and breakfast sausage stirred in. It was pretty awful.
My glass was CONSTANTLY empty. Sort of par for the course at this point. Our waiter was usually nowhere to be found, and later into the meal, disappeared entirely and was replaced with another waiter.
Another 20 minutes go by before we get our meals. I ordered the sirloin and shrimp. a 21 dollar plate. 10 oz sirloin, shrimp, two sides. The shrimp was ok but it was DRENCHED in cayenne pepper. I can handle spice pretty well but the shrimp set my mouth on fire. While the flavor of the shrimp was very good, the heat made it close to inedible. I can only imagine what it does to gentler taste buds.
Now, being a native born Texan and having lived all over the country, I feel that I have a pretty refined sense of what makes a good steak. I HAVE been eating steaks in all shapes and sizes for nearly 30 years. This steak was NOT a good steak. The first problem with the steak was that it was quite obviously soaked in brine to plump it up. They fed me a 6 oz sirloin with 4 oz of solution in it. I know this was done because of a few things.
First off, I ALWAYS order my steak medium. Steak is ruined when it gets to nearly well done and I don't like to risk it. Usually it cooks itself up to a nice medium-well after they plate it, unless the restaurant knows what the hell they're doing and removes the steak early so that it will reach that delicious medium on it's own. This steak was 100% medium-well and still climbing a bit. The steak still appeared to be juicy, though the juices were clear. This is the first sign of a steak soaked in a salt solution to plump it up and make the restaurant a quick buck. Even a well-done steak doesn't have completely clear juice.
Secondly, the steak was INCREDIBLY dry and powdery. The second sign that a steak is soaked in solution is how powdery it is. The meat should not turn to powder in your mouth, it should stay firm and meaty. This combined with how much juice was coming out of it are the most important signs of a solution soaked steak.
The next sign was the super salty flavor of the inside of the meat. The flavors from seasoning should come from the outside of the steak and compliment the steak itself. This salt was a briny salt flavor, like olives.
The steak, while powdery, was also very tough and hard to chew at only medium well. This is the final sign of it being soaked in solution. If you want to plump up a steak, pick a nice, non-salty marinade because the salt tends to ruin the meat if you over-soak it. Add salt later, especially light salt, beacuse it gives you an even more salty flavor while you only have to use less. That will be covered in another blog post though.
The sauteed mushrooms that I ordered as one of my sides were COMPLETELY inedible. They came straight from a can of store brand mushrooms and then were thrown on the griddle for a few minutes. They were not buttery nor were they fresh or delicious. They were ugly, all the same size like canned mushrooms and they tasted like ass and cheap tin can. I really have no better word to describe it. I can take a lot of tastes but these mushrooms were AWFUL. Sauteed mushrooms are not hard to make from fresh mushrooms, and if they had done this, they might have saved the meal, but they didn't. I adore sauteed mushrooms and these LITERALLY made me gag. I could barely swallow them, but I didn't touch another mushroom. They are the worst sauteed mushrooms I've had in my life and that's saying a LOT.
The baked potato was excellent however. It had just the right amount of butter and bacon, and though it was a little short on the cheese (there was only a pinch) it was still baked well and tasty with a salt crust. It was not enough to save the meal however.
I was even MORE outraged at the fact that they put disgusting, watered-down store brand A-1 sauce into actual A-1 sauce bottles. I couldn't even eat the sauce with the steak. The sauce certainly wasn't even strong enough to cover up the brine flavor in the meat, which is something A-1 does with abandon.
The steak came with a free piece of cornbread. The cornbread was some sort of pseudo-tex mex style cornbread with hot peppers blended in. The cornbread itself was good, but the peppers were awful and when I had a bite with peppers in it, it was gross.
I did try one of the desserts. I had a bite of a pie and it was pretty good.
So here are my ratings for Toby Keith's "I love this Bar and Grill".
Service:
3/10
The horribly ballsy decor and the absolute LACK of service make me give this place 3 out of 10 for service. This score was saved by the second waiter who was actually fairly attentive, though my glass ran dry 3 more times.
Food taste:
2/10
Saved by a baked potato and a pie from earning a 0. This isn't how a "steak house" style restaurant should serve meat, even if it's labeled as a bar and grill. I have eaten at hole-in-the-wall dives with better meat than this, and for far cheaper. Briny steak, gag-inducing sauteed mushrooms and bizarre cornbread ruined this meal for me.
Food quality:
1/10
Briny steak should NEVER be served by a steak house with prices over 10 dollars for a 10 oz sirloin. Sirloin just isn't that expensive. Especially when it's really a 6 oz sirloin. Store brand canned mushrooms, velveeta, and A-1 sauce dropped this score as well.
Price:
1/10
The prices at this place are retarded. They charge $17 for a 10 oz sirloin and then don't even deliver where they should. They also charge $23 for a paper thin t-shirt that has ironed on lines from toby keith songs.
Decor:
4/10
Despite the ballsy addition of anti-college-team propaganda, which I don't really care about either way, This place was LITTERED with posters and pictures and PAINTED PORTRAITS of Toby Keith. I realize it's his restaurant: I don't need to fucking stare at him and his enhanced in-jeans package while I eat. Seriously, the ladies at my table were laughing about how retarded his package looked in the PAINTED PORTRAIT of him that was staring at them.
Atmosphere:
5/10
Perhaps the one saving grace: this place was definitely a steak house.
OVERALL:
2 and 2/3 invaders out of goddamn 10.
Toby Keith's "I love this Bar and Grill" fails hardcore as both a steakhouse and as a grill. The bar was ok, but I don't drink. I probably should have taken up drinking before I ate at this hell-hole.
I am full, but WHOLLY UNSATISFIED!
This restaurant is capitalism at it's worst. GREED GREED GREED and no care for the customer. AVOID AT ALL COSTS unless you love shitty steak and horrible service.
I HATE THIS BAR AND GRILL!!!
I am a native Texan, born and raised, but I am currently located (working) in Northwest Arkansas. So, while I might not live in Texas anymore, the Angry Texan still comes out when I eat BAD steak!
